Tubal Factor Infertility

I just read a post about tubal factor infertility. Something I had never heard of to be honest…but something I do in fact have. When I had my lap back in January it was quite obvious my fallopian tubes were damaged. The RE initially thought it was due to an infection but after the lap realized it was just a side effect of the endo. He told me that I have a very high risk of ectopic pregnancy due to this tubal defect. But it never really sunk in until I read this article…and I never even knew it had a name…tubal factor infertility.

Let’s see that makes 1-2-3 infertility factors:

1. PCOS
2. Endometriosis
3. Tubal

On another note, the IUD is going well. Every now and then I’ll get the sensation that I’m going to start my period and I still have very minimal spotting. All in all, it’s not too bad though. I have one more appointment to schedule to check on it. Then I should be RE free for a while. I think our bank account could use the break ;)

Up late, worrying again…

Just realized it’s just a few days away from August. I should be excited because this month I’ll receive my last Lupron injection. However, it’s also sinking in that I made the decision to have and IUD inserted the same day. From the get go I’ve been worried about the pain of insertion and from reading posts online I have every reason to be :( Pelvic exams have been extremely unpleasant that last few times (thanks vaginismus!) and after reading about all this uterus measuring and “sounding” (whatever the heck that is) I’m a little…anxious. Also, I’m curious if anyone out there has been on Lupron and Mirena at the same time. Could this possibly eliminate any spotting, as I haven’t had a period in 5 months? Probably not…I’m going to load up on some painkillers before I go (like aleve…wish I still had something stronger ;) to reduce the cramping everyone talks about.

Anyways, I’ve had the privilege of helping out some friends lately…which has been amazing for me. It has come to my attention that not one but two dear friends have both scheduled laps for possible endo. It really saddens me but somehow makes what I have going on worth it. It almost had me on a “high” being able to share my experiences and to be a shoulder in what can seem like the loneliest place ever! I don’t want to be so secretive anymore…it’s much more therapeutic to let it all out!

Other things worth mentioning:

1. Bone scan went well. Easiest thing ever. Technician said I had a very nice spine…young and healthy :) Strange thing to hear but I took it as a compliment. I guess they aren’t used to someone my age having the test done. Still no results but I’m sure everything is fine.

2. I have to schedule a pelvic exam (ultrasound) soon to see how everything looks since my last vaginal ultrasound. In my 30 day post-op appt an endometrioma had already appeared. Hope that sucker is gone!

3. Lupron symptoms as of late: headaches, hot flashes, moodiness (get angry at the drop of a hat…I understand my mother so much better now ;) INSOMNIA. Some nights it takes forever for me to fall asleep…other times I wake up in the middle of the night for hours at a time. LAME! Increased appetite…meaning my clothes are fitting a little too tight these days.

Hopefully I’ll have good news to report after my next exam. Wish me luck :)

it’s baaack!

Ok. It’s been 4 weeks to the day since I had my laparoscopy. Everything has healed nicely. Incisions look good (minus the one random stitch that I saw that luckily disappeared before I had to get it removed.) Today was my second post-op appt. Three weeks ago they started me on Loestrin 24. Only side effect is break through bleeding and spotting everyday. So its like I had two periods since my surgery. Lucky me. Anywho…I went in this morning for a vaginal ultrasound and yeah…I have 2 endometriomas in my ovary already…ALREADY!! Isn’t that just awesome. My endo doesn’t mess around! I gave some blood…got a cervical culture…and cried to my RE (did I mention I really love that man…well you know as much as a girl can love a gyno.) So the next plan of attack: LUPRON. I was so against it but it seems to be my best option at the moment. And until I make up my little mind as to what my next step is…I could be on this stuff for a year. I’ve already been told to carry a fan with me…and I hope my husband doesn’t mind if I just set that thermostat to 60 at night. So March 6th I’ll start my journey…my menopausal journey.

I can’t stop crying…

I think I truly underestimated the severity of what was going on with me. This has been a really tough week. The last post left me feeling pretty good but by Thursday I was puking up my antibiotic and well…felt pretty horrible. It wasn’t until yesterday that I felt well enough to ask for some Wendy’s take out. Which I was regretting all night as I felt my stomach burning…ugh. This morning I had a post-op appointment with my RE. He really is such a nice man…I really appreciate what a spectacular job he did. I really had very little pain…next to nothing…just some minor discomfort. I was just nauseous most of the time. Anyways, this morning I was feeling so sick being in the RE’s office. Not to mention looking at the photos from my surgery made me want to vomit on his desk. Those pictures just confirmed the enormity of what I’m facing. The fact that until I have a radical surgery I’ll be trying to suppress this junk. Since I am currently undecided about IVF right now, we decided to start on birth control (yay! no more periods…) That way if I say go…we go…pretty much right off the bat. Man…why is this so tough. Why am I so emotional about all this?! Ok. Don’t answer that. I know. But still…I can’t seem to focus on anything else. Can I really go back to work and function as if everything in my life hasn’t been flipped upside down? I guess I’ll find out tomorrow :/ I’m so ready to feel somewhat normal and so glad that this is my last day on antibiotic. I really hope I gain some sort of appetite back. NOTHING sounds good to me. EVERYTHING smells funny to me. I need some normalcy. Soon. And a huge supply of tissues.

I made it!

First off, the bowel prep was pretty terrible (and it was flavored.) I did really good getting the the first 2-1/2 liters down…it was the last bit that had me severely nauseous. But I mustered to get at least 3 more glasses down. I suppose I was cleaned out pretty good. No complaints from the Drs. The next morning my blood sugar was so low and I was so weak that they offered me a wheelchair to take me back to the pre-op. I was white as a ghost. So in a way I was looking forward to the IV. I checked in at the outpatient desk and they took me right back. I had to take a pregnancy test (how ironic.) and then change into the lovely robe. Then came the IV. NOT fun. They would only put it in the top of my hand. Luckily I had already asked to lay down flat. But the smelling salts came out anyway. Then I asked was it STILL supposed to hurt till I looked up and found the nurse literally squeezing the fluid into my IV. Once she stopped it was fine…and I felt much better. Being dehydrated is no fun. They also took some blood to put into the database in case I needed a transfusion or something like that. Then all my family and friends got to see me before they took me back. I remember being rolled into the operating room and thinking how cool it looked. Next thing I remember is being in recovery and finally waking up. I had no nausea and I felt pretty darn good. They hooked me up with some pain meds and I even have a patch behind my ear to keep me from getting sick. I was really impressed with all the nurses and doctors…they were all so nice…and they were in no hurry to kick me out. So I got to sleep quite a bit. Only problem was my bladder was insanely full but I could not for the life of me urinate. I tried several times with nothing…and my stomach was getting uncomfortable. So they put in a catheter (which I thought was going to be horrendous…it wasn’t at all…maybe it was because the lidocaine my RE told her to use. Anways they drained 800 ccs out of me…talk about relief. But I still could not urinate on my own after that. They then decided to move me to the short term care area. Where I finally made three trips the bathroom with success. So by 945 I was finally discharged. yay! Too bad I had to go a million times during the night. They had given me 5 bags of fluid…that is freaking a lot…I was so puffy.

Now the news, the pathologist report came back negative!! But I do have stage 4 endo (apparently it looked like spider webs in there.) And he cleaned out my tubes…which are worthless…they don’t work. So there is my answer. Can I have children on my own? no. I’ll be meeting with my RE on Monday…He’ll discuss the findings and I’ll finally get to see the pictures…apparently he took a bunch. I think he was totally shocked when he went in to see how bad it was. At first he didn’t know if he could take care of all of it with the lap but he did. So no big incisions. My belly button is bothering me right now…I also have 3 more tin incisions (2 on one side, 1 on the other.) Oh and they gave me another IV in the side of my arm. Not sure why though but at least I was asleep. I’ve done really well. I think I keep shocking folks when they call me. Of course it may be the meds that are making me so chipper and talkative. So other than some minor pain and discomfort I feel great. Just trying to stay pretty hydrated.

Thanks to everyone for their support and encouraging words! I’m so glad its over…well at least for now. I’ll keep everyone posted on my nest RE appt. It should be interesting.

p.s. don’t mind any typos you might see because I have lost my sight looking at things close…even with my glasses on. Waiting for that to go away so I can actually read a magazine or something!

Not looking forward to this:

Nulytely.

I go to pick up my prescription and they pass me a GALLON jug. Seriously. I googled it to get the downlow on how people actually do this. Found lots of things to do or not to do. I called the pharmacist to see if they had any advice…what exactly was the best way to drink a gallon of this stuff. He was no help. Read straight from the directions…duh…I can do that…just didn’t know if you had an insiders tip! Pointless. Going to the store to get some broth for tomorrow. I hear its better to start on a liquid diet before cleaning out the colon. Apparently it’s also a good idea to invest in some desitin too…I mean come on…what IS this stuff?! So hoping this will go quickly and painlessly.

Is this a record?!

My insurance just authorized/approved my surgery just 4 days prior. That has to be cutting it close. To be honest I was getting a little nervous about it…wondering if the wrong social security # had something to do with it. Probably. Anywho…guess we’re all set.

Dropped off my prescriptions this afternoon. Percocet, Doxycycline and one more (can’t remember the name) for the glorious colon cleanse I’ll be doing on Sunday. Hoping that won’t be as bad as I think.

Trying to think of last minute stuff I need to get done before I’m stuck in a bed for the week. Wash sheets…clean bathroom and kitchen…buy more dog chews (so he’ll leave me alone)…finish graphic stuff for work. I know it’s a courtesy to tell co-workers you’ll be out for a week but it’s really getting stressful. I keep getting loaded up with stuff to do “before I leave.” Note to self: keep this a secret next time ;)

Feeling less than great today. I feel like my eyes are 100 lbs. I keep feeling the stress in my neck/shoulders/jaw. I’m a jaw clencher…I hate it. So I’m feeling very fatigued today.

wow…

That is all I have to say at this point. I had my pre-op appointment yesterday. Can I just say that it is so worth the extra time and expense to hire competent people! For the patient’s sake at least. It was a little unnerving having someone register me for surgery that could NOT spell “hummingbird” or “cardinal” (each of these words corresponds to some of my personal info.) Wow. She was so unsure of what she was doing that I would not be surprised if I showed up on Monday and they had no clue who I was! Not to mention my info wasn’t in the computer system AND my re’s office has me under the WRONG social security number. REALLY PEOPLE?! OMG. Oh and let’s not forget my surgery isn’t even authorized yet by my insurance… it’s a week away! AND it’s like pulling teeth to get anyone to call me back! Sorry…I just had to vent…this is getting a little too ridiculous for me.

Pre-Op

Somebody actaully called me back…on the same day…now that is a miracle! Jan 19th I’ll be going in for my pre-op work. Physical, family history and bloodwork. Can’t wait :/

scared.

Finally have a date scheduled for my surgery. January the 26th at 10:30 in the morning. The only good thing I can think of at the moment is at least I only have to be in by 8:30am. I thought I’d be OK with knowing exactly when I would be going in but to tell you the truth…I’m totally freaked. I’ve only told my parents and my husband this news…I don’t feel like talking about it to anyone else. Maybe I’d feel a little different if I knew I were only going in for laparoscopy. But we are calling this an “exploratory” surgery. Meaning there is a chance it could get major. There is a chance I could end up with a very large incision to go along with the three little ones. I could come out with a lot less than I go in with. All these things keep rattling in my head. The fact that I will be going into a real OR for the first time instead of the ambulatory center (where most of these surgeries take place) unnerves me. I called in today to schedule the pre-op. I guess I’ll get more details and instructions then. I assume I’ll give more blood. NOT happy about that or the impending IV or catheter or whatever else they’ll do.

So this new years  was bittersweet. Watching the ball drop only pushed me closer to the day I dread. Even though I’m hoping 2009 will prove to be better than last year, right now I can’t see it happening. I’m just pessimistic that way.