Stretching the Pelvic Floor Muscles Using a Dilator

The previous post talked about inserting a dilator but just leaving it in. This list explains what to do with the dilator besides allowing it to sit and stretch.

  1. Apply lubricant on the outer skin of vagina. Apply lubricant to end of dilator.
  2. Spread the skin away from the vaginal opening. Place the end of the dilator at the opening.
  3. Do a maximum contraction of the pelvic floor muscles. Tighten the vagina and the anus maximally and then relax.
  4. When you know they are relaxed, gently and slowly insert the dilator into your vagina directing it slightly downward for 2-3 inches of insertion.
  5. Relax and stretch the vagina at the 6 o’clock position.
  6. Hold the stretch for ____ seconds and repeat ____ times with ____ seconds rest break between each stretch.
  7. Repeat the stretching in the 4 o’clock and 8 o’clock positions.
  8. Total time should be ____ minutes, ____ x per day. Note the amount of time you were able to achieve and your tolerance to the dilator in your vagina.
  9. When ready, advance to moving the dilator in and out of your vagina.
  10. Once you have accomplished the techniques you may try them standing with one foot resting on the tub, or in other positions.

I left some blanks in there as they will be different for each person. I usually do a stretch for 1 minute each. I start a session out with a hot bath. Then I do one Kegel and release to make sure I’m at the most relaxed state I can be. I start with my thumb so I can actually feel the muscle tone and start the stretch. One minute at 6, 4 and 8 o’clock positions…usually 2x. Then I’ll use the smallest dilator then move onto my largest (I only have two dilators). After I do the stretching, I leave the largest dilator in for several minutes allowing it to stretch the muscles. I’m working on the in and out thing. That still causes a lot of burning and rawness. But I’m making progress.

I hope this helps any of you trying this method of treatment :)


11 Responses

  1. i am really sorry you have to deal with this, it does NOT sound like fun!

  2. I’ve just started on my dilators and yesterday I managed to leave the smallest (of 4) in for 5 mins. I was so proud of myself,but I know I have a long road ahead of me. When I’ve done this for a few more days I’ll write more on my blog about it-I don’t want to get my hopes up too soon! :-)

    • That is awesome!!! it is a long road but we have to keep thinking of the end result right…it will get better and this is curable. Some sessions are easier than others. I find that taking a hot bath helps and really paying attention to the “drop” sensation when I do kegels. Even though my muscles never fully relax they are at least going in the right direction. I no longer have the “wall” that I first had when inserting a larger dilator. Just keep it up consistently.

  3. Oh my gosh! This is the first time I’ve read about anyone having the “in and out” pain just like me. So what do you do? Do you move the dilator in and out for a certain amount of time? That is what I’ve been doing for a while, but I’m not sure I feel any difference. My other problem is that the dilator is smooth, and when we try doing it with my husbands finger instead, it hurts a lot more from the added friction. Any suggestions?

  4. Yes all my pain is located really at the entry point. So stretching those muscles has been crucial to my recovery. Instead of doing the “in and out” thing I would suggest just leaving it in for a couple of minutes without moving it. You’re really just trying to stretch the muscles. Here is exactly my regimen:

    -Hot Bath for 15-30 minutes (I would do my kegels in the tub: hold for 10 sec release for 10 sec about 30x then hold for 2 sec release for 2 sec about 30x)
    -I used my thumb (lubricated) instead of fingers to stretch the muscles as I needed to push down pretty hard. I would make sure my muscles were at their most relaxed point (do one contract and release) then I would push down (as much as I could stand) for about a minute; I would do that in the 4 and 8 oclock positions as well maybe 2-3x each.
    -Then I’d insert the first dilator (mine are more anatomically correct meaning there is sort of a head on them but they are still smooth) I would do the exact same thing I did with my thumb
    -Last I’d use the larger dilator (I only had two) and repeat.

    I tried to do the “in and out” thing but it wasn’t all that comfortable so I would just concentrate on stretching those muscles instead. And I have to say that the penis is a lot more forgiving than the dilator… don’t forget that. Its obviously not quite as rigid and its not as rough as say a finger. And don’t forget the all important lube… my PT told me slippery stuff was the best… I haven’t bought any yet though so I can’t give my recommendation.

    Best of luck to ya! If you have anymore questions just let me know :)

  5. Hi , I am feeling same things , I am trying the dilators and reached the second size. The problem I am having is bleeding and a burning sensation every time I am inserting the dilator. Is this normal ?

    • You may be moving to fast. I would stick with whatever dilator is not causing the bleeding and burning. It took me a while to graduate to the second one where it didn’t hurt. It’s so important to stay away from pain…it’s those sensations that trigger your tense muscles. Is it normal to have bleeding and burning… with vaginismus, yes… with using the dilators, no. Once you get any physical discomfort I would stop. I would suggest using the exercises I have listed on my blog (the kegel exercises) and concentrating on how your muscles feel when they are relaxed. Plus I would start stretching the muscles with my thumb (weird I know) and then work up to the dilator. It took me 12 weeks of therapy to get to a place where neither dilator caused pain. If you have any other questions please feel free to ask… it’s terrible facing it alone!

  6. Thank you so much for your support, I really appreciate your help and this blog , I am now ok with the second size and will take it easy as you said untill reaching the stage of using it without it causing bleeding. Thanks again as you said its terrible facing this alone.

  7. I struggled for so many years and never met anyone who shared the same problems. Nobody really wants to share about it either. So we just bottle it up. I finally was able to find someone to help me and that was truly an amazing experience! I hope that what I learned can help others like you. And just so you know… I haven’t blogged in a couple of months and I still get hits on these posts about vaginismus. So there are a lot of women out there dealing with the same junk! If only it were ever talked about and that Drs actually knew how to treat it! I would seriously look into a physical therapist in your area. I scoured my area for one that specialized in pelvic pain. It wasn’t cheap… but it really just depends on your insurance… if you have any. Hang in there girl. It will get better.

  8. I am really greatfull for you support and encouragement. I am now taking it easy as you said , I am only still suffering the burning sensation after removing the dilator by probably 2 minutes ,, its a very severe burning sensation but now without bleeding. Hope things get better soon , thanks alot for you support.

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