I can’t stop crying…

I think I truly underestimated the severity of what was going on with me. This has been a really tough week. The last post left me feeling pretty good but by Thursday I was puking up my antibiotic and well…felt pretty horrible. It wasn’t until yesterday that I felt well enough to ask for some Wendy’s take out. Which I was regretting all night as I felt my stomach burning…ugh. This morning I had a post-op appointment with my RE. He really is such a nice man…I really appreciate what a spectacular job he did. I really had very little pain…next to nothing…just some minor discomfort. I was just nauseous most of the time. Anyways, this morning I was feeling so sick being in the RE’s office. Not to mention looking at the photos from my surgery made me want to vomit on his desk. Those pictures just confirmed the enormity of what I’m facing. The fact that until I have a radical surgery I’ll be trying to suppress this junk. Since I am currently undecided about IVF right now, we decided to start on birth control (yay! no more periods…) That way if I say go…we go…pretty much right off the bat. Man…why is this so tough. Why am I so emotional about all this?! Ok. Don’t answer that. I know. But still…I can’t seem to focus on anything else. Can I really go back to work and function as if everything in my life hasn’t been flipped upside down? I guess I’ll find out tomorrow :/ I’m so ready to feel somewhat normal and so glad that this is my last day on antibiotic. I really hope I gain some sort of appetite back. NOTHING sounds good to me. EVERYTHING smells funny to me. I need some normalcy. Soon. And a huge supply of tissues.

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