Why am I so nervous?

My DH and I are getting phone calls to schedule some tests. We’ve decided not to go any further until we’ve saved up some cash. So why am I so nervous to call and just say that? I guess I’m afraid they will question my decision. Convince me in some way to keep going. In a way, I just don’t want to talk about it anymore…I want to avoid it…which is a bad idea but still very appealing. Maybe I’ll get my nerve up later.

DH planned a dinner for us and his parents tomorrow night. I’m nervous about that too…about breaking this news. To be honest I haven’t been diagnosed with anything yet…there are just a lot of red flags so to speak. Everything is a big question mark in my mind. But all paths lead to some sort of intervention. We’ll see what happens. Say a quick prayer for us please.

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