our quiet hope

Meet Makaiya Hope…

kasdaniels — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 03:16:00 +0000

Here is our little bundle of joy. She is an absolute dream!!! We welcomed her home April 5th. She sleeps 13 hours a night and loves to talk, smile and blow raspberries ;) We couldn’t be more in love with our precious daughter!!!

We are FINALLY parents!!!

kasdaniels — Wed, 23 Mar 2011 21:21:24 +0000

Daddy and mommy have both signed the papers and want placement to happen ASAP! So as soon as interstate paperwork goes through (which should take 2 weeks or less) we’ll have our placement ceremony with the birth family, interim care family and our family. What a wild ride people… what a crazy and exciting ride.

March… you have not been kind…

kasdaniels — Mon, 21 Mar 2011 21:56:10 +0000

So this month has been nothing short of a nightmare. The first week the agency asked us if we wanted to continue with our adoption because once again we had another twist (we decided to stick with it.) The following week we had to lay our dog of 15 years to rest. And let me just say that almost put me in the grave. I have never experienced grief quite like that. I still miss my Buck but I know it was the right thing to do… he was old and he was ill. My husband stayed in the car while I held my dog as he passed on. I don’t regret that decision but it was so heart breaking. Now the house is eerily quiet and I’m still getting used to my shadow being gone. The next week we learned that my side job didn’t take federal taxes out of my pay for all of 2010. Apparently, it was a glitch. Still wasn’t happy about it though. Friday we FINALLY got a positive paternity test!!! We were supposed to hear something this afternoon about whether or not the father signed. It is now 6pm and still not a peep. Can I just say… April cannot get here fast enough?!

Happy Birthday, baby!

kasdaniels — Thu, 03 Feb 2011 14:54:18 +0000

I couldn’t stand going to bed without singing Happy Birthday to my favorite little girl. She turned 2 months old yesterday.

Staying put…

kasdaniels — Thu, 27 Jan 2011 16:48:25 +0000

I’ve been praying for so many things surrounding our adoption for the last two months. Many things God has blatantly answered… literally within days… and has changed my whole view of prayer… forever. It works. There is definitely power in prayer and I honestly have never been more convinced than I am right now. God is waiting for us to communicate with him and embrace the love He has for us. Now I admit, it took a pretty big event for me to finally do just that. He is stretching me and I am learning what this whole “faith” thing is really all about.

This whole talk of faith and prayer brings me to this. I have been praying about our birth father situation. A situation that has us two months in still wondering when and what the outcome will be. I have been praying that this man will be surrounded by people, familiar with the situation, to speak God’s love into him and help him make a decision that is best for Makaiya. From the beginning he has been avoiding the situation… avoiding any contact with our agency … meaning we would have to publish an ad for 60 days waiting for him to respond. But there has been a new development. There is contact info to be obtained… meaning we can’t prove to the courts that he is unreachable… meaning we can’t publish at this point. The tricky part is getting the address. He will be served papers but no one knows how he will respond. There are so many scenarios. And our case worker says things look “murky” right now. Yes, this could mean a refusal on the birth father’s end. This could mean that Makaiya will not find her forever family with us. But this is where my faith is being tested. God could very well be answering my prayer… like He has so many times lately… and orchestrating something that could benefit us far more and move things much more quickly. Instead of waiting the 60 days, like we originally thought, it could be cut down to 30 or maybe even less. I’m trusting that God is doing something miraculous here. Something that could only be attributed to His power. It just breaks my heart that baby girl is stuck in limbo right now. Not that she isn’t being cared for but she is neither with her birth family nor with her forever family.

Our destination this weekend has been hit by some weather, and with the uncertainty of the situation, we will not be traveling to see her tomorrow. I’m saddened by this but feel we need to step back just a little until we find out more info.

In the meantime, we will continue to pray and seek out His wisdom and insight and strength… and I will continue to place my faith in the One who created us. And I can’t help but imagine Him saying, “Hey! No worries, I got this!” ;)

On the road again…

kasdaniels — Wed, 26 Jan 2011 15:23:46 +0000

We leave out again Thursday night for our weekly road trip to visit baby girl. Feeling excited and a lot less nervous ;) I am in the process of creating a private blog for her birth mother and family. I really hope they like it :) I’ve also been in the process of putting some gifts together for Makaiya’s birth mother and interim care mother. I thought I should share a link to a little company on etsy where I’m ordering the gifts. It is run by three friends that who were brought together through their passion for adoption. And it shows. The business is called “the r house couture” and I haven’t found anyone else creating such perfect gifts for birth mothers. Here is the set I am ordering for her and baby girl. I just love it. I am thinking of something that says “mother to many” for Makaiya’s interim care mother and maybe a James 1:27 reference. Not entirely sure. I’m always open to ideas. It’s been tough trying to find just the right gifts to express my gratitude. Hope these links have been helpful for anyone else out there looking for something special to give the the beautiful women in our lives :)

I’m learning…

kasdaniels — Tue, 18 Jan 2011 15:12:53 +0000

Every adoption story is different. Some families have to wait many months or years after a referral… some parents pick their babies up from the hospital. So many scenarios… so many outcomes. Our story keeps changing and our placement date keeps getting moved farther and farther away. Not drastically but enough to tug at my heart. After meeting our angel last Friday we are so in love and are so ready to bring her home. Yet there is red tape. Lots of red tape preventing us from doing just that. Interstate adoption has its perks. We have been able to learn and love a new place. It’s beginning to feel like a second home to us (since we’ve traveled there 3 times in 3 weeks) and we have experienced new sights and have been welcomed into a wonderful office full of wonderful case workers. But in order to bring our baby girl out of state lots of paperwork has to go through and that is taking a while. In the mean time, we have two more visits scheduled to spend time with Makaiya. I honestly can’t wait! I just know she is going to seem bigger and older from our last visit. Which saddens me a little. All I can do is pray for all the people involved in the process and expect God to do mighty things. I just need to be patient and hopeful. Which reminds me of a quote we were told in an early adoption meeting: Keep your expectations low and your hopes high. I’d say that’s pretty good advice ;)

My heart is complete.

kasdaniels — Mon, 10 Jan 2011 15:20:17 +0000

Our meeting last week was just a dream. And by that I mean, absolutely amazing! I am still in awe of the plans God orchestrated to bring our families together. Truly blessed. We head out the week of February 7th to pick up our baby girl… Makaiya :)

Somebody pinch me……

Is it Thursday yet?

kasdaniels — Tue, 04 Jan 2011 22:52:51 +0000

Dreading the 4.5 hr drive (for the 5th time in a week) but so looking forward to meeting baby girl’s mama and grandmother this Thursday :) Is this really happening?!

Dear baby girl…

kasdaniels — Wed, 22 Dec 2010 15:36:23 +0000

There are things I want to write down for fear of forgetting it all. Things I want to be able to share with you one day about how “God found us you.”

We had a hope that just maybe we would find you by this Christmas…

Two people had visions that we would be blessed with a daughter…

Just two days before Thanksgiving we were saddened to know that nobody out there was looking at us… God heard my cries and exactly one week later brought your mommy into our lives… we were shocked that you were due to come into the world only 10 days later… even more shocked to know you came early!

The day after you were born God drew me near… He spoke to me like he never has before…

Just yesterday, we got “the” call that your mommy liked us and wants to meet us!

We learned all about you… even your beautiful name… the name God knew was forever yours…

We had a party last night where several people approached me to say they heard we were having a baby in December… how did they know this?! You were our beautiful secret…

In the past week I have had thoughts… or dreams… of telling our family this Christmas that we had found you… God obviously placed you on my heart… He is the true giver of hope…

We will travel to your birthplace… a city I have never been… but a place where our best friends lived just 3 years ago before we met them…

In just two weeks we will meet your mommy and hopefully our lives will be entwined forever…

We love you precious angel and we can’t wait to meet YOU!